I
wondered what it would be like when I returned to the hotel room where the
noises from the freeway traffic were constant. I left the silent clock and continued to the
stairs. I had only walked up three or
four steps when I felt a wave of nausea sweep over me. I stopped, reaching out
to grab the railing, and fell to my knees.
I
turned around and sat down on the steps to catch my breath. As soon as I turned
I felt much better. I sat for a moment to let the sick sensation depart then I
stood and began up the stairs again. I only made it two steps this time before
the nausea returned.
I
sat down again and waited until it passed. Clearly I had a choice: either there
was something up there that I wasn’t supposed to see or there was something
that someone didn’t want me to see and I had to decide what to do about it.
I’m
definitely not someone who enjoyed pain, discomfort or danger, so I wasn’t
really jumping on board with running up the stairs to some horror, but I also
hated being told what to do and being left in the dark. If I didn’t find out what
was up there it would torture me for the rest of my life.
“I’m
tired of being left in the dark,” I muttered out loud if only for the sake of
convincing myself.
Taking
a deep breath, I turned and ran up the stairs as quickly as I could. I made it
about halfway up to the next level before I had to stop and still my heaving
stomach. I paused for several minutes catching my breath and trying very hard
not to throw up. Since I hadn’t heard my guiding ‘voice’ I figured this was
where I had to go.
With another deep
breath I dashed up the remaining steps. Not only did I feel sick to my stomach,
but I also had waves of dizziness sweep over me. I reached out to grab the
railing and felt myself sinking to the floor. With my last conscious thought I
wondered what time it was.
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